After-dinner ravioli looks like pasta—but it’s really chocolate.

It's more than just the food -
cooking is romantic.

By now, everyone is familiar with my theory that, at least for most of us, food is not about hunger, it is about love. The evening meal is a time we share to review the events of the day, connect as a family and show our support for one another. Oh yes, and enjoy some meatloaf and mashed potatoes. In that case, the food is truly incidental to gathering at the hearth with “us” after a day with “them.” Some of the most memorable meals of our lives may have nothing to do with memorable food.

In the first blush of infatuation, a couple might dine on burned toast and rubbery eggs at a 24-hour diner and then return to the same dive every year on their anniversary. It certainly isn’t to enjoy the cuisine. The most anticipated family meal of the year is more often than not a disaster of dried-out turkey, salty gravy and pasty mashed potatoes. Cooking and food can also be a more direct communication of love and sharing. The care and attention given to preparing a favorite dish is a subtle but effective way of telling a person how much you care for him or her and want to make him or her happy.

It wasn’t until I started cooking for myself and realized just how labor-intensive some of my favorite dishes were to prepare that I could appreciate the depth of devotion my mother and grandmother showered on us night after night, week after week and year after year. Finally there are certain foods we associate directly or symbolically with romantic love. The apples and pomegranates, the oysters and shrimp, honey and pine nuts are just some of the sensual foods people believe will light the fires of passion. For a more extensive list along with some terrific recipes, see Martha Hopkins’ fascinating InterCourses: An Aphrodisiac Cookbook—or just turn to page 58 for some ideas from Pittsburgh chefs. For this Valentine’s Day, we have a recipe that uses two versions of everyone’s favorite romantic food, chocolate. Prepare it with care and share it with someone you love. That way, you’ll have all the bases covered.

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TOP 10 ESSENTIALS FOR COOKING
Here's my top-10 list of kitchen essentials for a well-equipped kitchen:

1. An 8-inch chef knife and 3-inch paring knife. Make sure they are high-carbon stainless, forged knives. Avoid the "82-knife set."

2. Cutting board. I favor nylon or bamboo. In either case, make sure it is lightweight and at least 12-by-20-inches.

3. Measuring cups and spoons. You'll need a 2-cup and a 4-cup liquid measuring cup, a set of measuring cups for dry ingredients and a set of measuring spoons. Stainless steel is the most durable.

4. A 12-inch nonstick skillet with cover. Tri-ply such as All-Clad is the best for even heating. This pan does everything from omelets to sautés.

5. An 8-quart stock pot. This is essential for boiling pasta, steaming vegetables or making large batches of chili, soups and stews.

6. Colander. Get stainless steel with firmly riveted handles.

7. A 3-quart covered saucepan. This rounds out your pots-and-pans inventory for small boiling projects and heating canned soups.

8. A four-sided cheese grater. Freshly grated cheese is a big flavor boost for your cooking. This tool is also useful for grating vegetables and shredding lemon zest.

9. Sheet pan. This inexpensive pan has raised sides and can be used to bake cookies, breads and pizza, or to roast vegetables and meats.

10. A 6-quart slow cooker. This is a working couple's best friend. Ten minutes of prep in the morning yields a dinner entree and loads of leftovers. The models with the thickest insert provide the slowest, most-even cooking. Be sure it's at least a 5-quart capacity.

- Chris Fennimore